Image by Rene Rauschenberger

In this Article:

• What is resistance, and how does it limit your potential?
• How to recognize and transform resistance into a powerful ally.
• Mindful strategies for overcoming resistance and achieving your desires.
• The R.I.S.E. method: A step-by-step guide to working with resistance.
• How to balance desire, intention, and resistance for transformation.

How to Overcome Resistance to Change and Free Yourself from Limitations

by Sue Van Raes.

Resistance is a strong (and often unconscious) force deep within you that rears its head when you try to do something different, to add in a new habit, or to stretch your capacity in some way. Resistance feels like a force moving against you, inevitably keeping you stuck or seeming to sabotage your path to deep fulfillment and peace.

Even though you can practically see yourself being stuck, you can’t seem to trick the sly force field of resistance. We all know what we need to be doing to get closer to what we want. Our problems lie not in knowing. The obstacle we all share lies with our patterns of resistance.

Resistance is universal — a very human reaction that we all share. Even the most well-renowned teachers and motivational speakers speak about their continual encounters with resistance.

Often resistance will feel like an internal struggle between two parts of yourself: a part that wants to change and a part that would rather stay comfortable, so it fights back. It can show up as an internal or external experience. Internally, this might look like a physiological reaction such as fatigue, brain fog, or nausea. Your internal resistance may come from self-doubt, a lack of self-discipline, or a limiting belief about yourself. Resistance shows up as a body-centered quality, letting you know when you feel threatened and swooping in to protect you. Externally, resistance might look like an environmental stressor, harsh economic times, or a lack of resources or support.

You often will experience heightened resistance in order to protect the wounded parts of yourself, the places that feel too vulnerable and tender. Despite the negative reputation resistance evokes, resistance wants to keep you safe. Similarly, resistance often highlights aspects of your life that are craving your attention, healing, and love.

Paying Attention to the When and Where of Resistance

You have the opportunity to be in the present moment with your resistance, to notice it via the physical sensations that are arising and to give them space to just be for a moment. Your resistance deeply wants to be heard, seen, and validated.

While you likely do not want your resistance running the show, you can ask it to be of assistance, to be there if needed, knowing it is doing the exact job it is there to do — to have your back!

When you anticipate resistance, notice it as it arises, and mindfully inquire into it, you have the opportunity to reckon with your resistance — to decide how to move forward with it and through it. Watch for resistance clues such as fear, guilt, overwhelm, tiredness, apathy, making excuses, distractions, or procrastination.

According to Zen teacher Cheri Huber, when we ask ourselves how we are experiencing resistance, we open ourselves up to being present with what is actually happening. “The how allows us to get a sense of life as a process — dynamic, active, and ever unfolding.” How are you experiencing your resistance? Where do you notice resistance sensations in your body? What is your inner dialogue saying?

Resistance may be protecting you from a variety of internal aspects that pose a threat:

• Fear of failure
• Excessive vulnerability
• Shame
• Unhealed wound or trauma that has been triggered
• Feelings (pleasant or unpleasant) that you would rather not feel
• Releasing a limiting belief that you have been believing for decades
• Letting go of the stories that your mind tells you (not good enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough)
• Being uncomfortable with change or something new
• Fear of success

If you try to change a behavior too fast, you might shut down. If you do not feel safe in your environment or in your own body, you will revert to old coping behaviors that temporarily calm you down and quell your anxiety, even if just for a moment.

Embrace All Aspects of You

Reckoning with your resistance is not the same as overriding your body. It is not forcing or pushing through it just to get to the other side. It is not jumping off your metaphorical cliff if it feels like too much. It is not about guilting and shaming your way through the resistance, and it is definitely not about self-judgment.

Reckoning with resistance is a spiritual inquiry. It is an opportunity for mindfulness. It is patient. It is slow and steady. It is safety (inner and outer). It is self-loving. Reckoning with resistance is a body-centered practice in understanding change, in terms of how much you’re ready for, how fast to take it, and the level of intensity you can handle.

I have learned a lot about my resistance in the past few years, the times I would rather not follow through, not go, not try. There are tasks that have made me uncomfortable, and I have elaborate ways of keeping them on my to-do list for weeks at a time. There are automatic excuses I catch myself using to avoid experiencing something new, and most important, there is what happens when I see my resistance all the way through to the other side.

Sometimes I give myself time to let resistance do her thing, and then I circle back in a couple of days. In fact, resistance has become an important teacher for me. Resistance has helped me find my edge, grow my capacity, cultivate patience, become more innovative with my resources, and turn me inward for more personal inquiry and self-knowledge.

In many cases, resistance has offered me a renewed pathway forward. So I befriended resistance and made it my teacher rather than my enemy.

R.I.S.E. with Your Resistance

When you call forth your inner awareness and begin to see your resistance patterns as they show up in real time, you can practice the R.I.S.E. method to mindfully attend to resistance.

• Recognize: Acknowledging your inner resistance to whatever you intend will help you move through it gracefully. In fact, simply by recognizing resistance, you have created space and perspective. You have already become the witness, less identified with the resistance as you and more identified with it as a part of you.

• Investigate: Often resistance blends with your limiting beliefs or self-critical thoughts to disempower you. Taking stock of what your resistance feels like in your body, how it impacts your mindset and the quality of your thoughts, and what may be underlying within it is a good place to begin.

• Shift: You may often find yourself ignoring your little successes and focusing on the gargantuan goals that may require some time and patience. An all-or-nothing approach is a perfect invitation for resistance. When your resistance shows up to the party, try celebrating your little successes and victories. As you track your progress, and gradually begin to align your actions, you will fuel your inspiration and build your momentum forward.

• Elevate: After some time, exploration, and repetition, you can consciously practice releasing your resistance. Thank her for her protection, give her permission to relax until she is needed again, and keep moving forward, one baby step at a time.

As you become familiar with and take steps toward all you are seeking, you will affirm your true desires and your mindful intentions, and of course, you will recognize your resistance. To help you along, I have a favorite exercise to share with you, one that I learned from yoga scholar Rod Stryker and have used for decades. It is rooted in ancient yogic teachings. I’ve adapted it here for you, from Sanskrit to English, and into a very accessible and user-friendly framework.

The Envision Equation

Desire + Intention > Resistance = Transformation

• Think of this equation as your metaphorical inner teeter-totter. When it is working in your favor, your intentions and desires are heavier than your resistance, and you can move closer to what you want. When your resistance is heavier, you almost inevitably will stay stuck on the ground.

• Let’s hang out on this playground for a moment together. There are many ways to strengthen the desire and intention side of your teeter-totter and to diminish the weight of your resistance: unearthing what you truly want, declaring your intentions, creating support, and scheduling regular accountability. You can also explore cultivating diligence and consistency and creating a regular daily practice or time to focus on what you are working on. You can set a time of day to meditate on your intentions, a time to engage in aligned actions (I love to put them in my calendar), and a time for celebrating your small and big successes.

• To relax your resistance once you have seen it clearly, you begin to recognize where your limiting beliefs and patterns are showing up and what they are saying. Here you can practice rewriting and shifting them into a revised variation that will better support what you are seeking for your well-being. If your resistance is more external, such as a lack of resources or feeling a time crunch, you can start to employ your creativity. Maybe you can qualify for a loan, a grant, a scholarship, or a payment plan. You could try diligently time blocking in your calendar or asking a family member to watch your kids for a few hours once a week to open up your schedule a bit. Remember, this practice requires some patience, but with steadfastness and mindfulness, you will reveal your resistance, use it for good, and release it in due time.

• Your turn! Take a moment for yourself. Grab your journal and your pen, and at the top of your page write down the Envision Equation. Then make three columns: Desire, Intention, Resistance. (Grab your free Envision Equation template at BoulderNutrition.com/foodandfreedom.)

• Put your pen to paper. Under each heading, put down any thoughts or feelings about each of your desires. Place each column on your metaphorical teeter-totter (noting that not all words and phrases weigh the same), and see what is needed. Next, write down the three loving aligned actions you can take toward realizing all you desire so that your teeter-totter begins to weigh in your favor. See where you can strengthen your desires and intentions and soften your resistance. How does your teeter-totter fare now?

Copyright 2024. All Rights Reserved.
Condensed and adapted with permission.

Article Source:

BOOK: Food and Freedom

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by Sue Van Raes.

Food and Freedom is a journey to reclaiming your wholeness and experiencing more mindfulness, personal fulfillment, and pleasure with food and in life. This trustworthy guide is rich with personal memoir, inspiring case studies from clients, soulful teachings, self-study prompts, nourishing recipes, and techniques to support biochemistry, satiation, and metabolic health. It will help you create body compassion and give you the confidence to show up in life as who you truly are, remedy emotional eating, and prosper with embodied self-care.

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About the Author

Sue Van Raes, author of Food and Freedom, is a functional nutritionist, food psychology specialist, and psycho-spiritual practitioner, who is dedicated to helping women who are stressed out about food finally make peace with their plates. After her life-long struggle with food and two decades of private practice, she discovered a surprising pathway to a renewed relationship with food. Sue draws on her personal and professional experience providing a body, mind, heart, and soul approach to stop stressing and start fully living. Visit the author's website at: BoulderNutrition.com

Article Recap:

Resistance is a powerful and often unconscious force that can keep you stuck and limit your potential. This article explores how to recognize and work through resistance using mindful strategies and the R.I.S.E. method. By acknowledging resistance and understanding its protective role, you can transform it into a powerful ally that supports your journey toward personal growth and fulfillment. The Envision Equation offers a framework to balance your desires, intentions, and resistance, guiding you toward transformation and freedom from limitations.