It is often believed that hierarchical and sometimes oppressive social structures like the patriarchy are somehow natural – a reflection of the law of the jungle. But the social structure of today’s hunter gatherers suggests that our ancestors were in fact highly egalitarian, even when it came to gender. Their secret? Not living with many relatives.
- By Servet Hasan
Let’s face it breakups hurt. Why? Well, for the most part it’s painful because it represents a loss. And, I’m not just talking about the loss of a loved one, but of the dream that you thought you once shared. Often this sense of a letdown is followed by stress and grief.
For a good marriage, who is the most important person with whom you should be communicating well? If you think it’s your spouse, think again. The most important person to converse with constructively is yourself! You need not try to resolve every situation by talking it over with your partner.
Research has shown that children of poorer parents display substantially worse math and reading skills by the time they start grade school. Other studies have revealed that these wide gaps in pre-school skills persist into adulthood and help explain low educational attainment and lifetime earnings.
All good communication boils down to following four simple rules. Abiding by them, anyone can communicate about any topic effectively and lovingly. There are also four opposing violations that create the misunderstandings and ensuing hurt, alienation and confusion that we experience when communicating with others.
- By Alan Cohen
How much more meaningful would our moments with loved ones be if we treated them as if this might be our last time together? We would not squabble over petty issues. We would remember what’s important. A Course in Miracles tells us that the world we see is inside out and upside down.
- By Vicky Oliver
Long before the invention of Facebook and Match.com, our ancestors grappled with how to improve their social lives, forge beneficial connections, and strengthen their reputations. Their insights will help us enhance our social lives, extend our online social networks, and lead to greater opportunities for success.
A new exhibition at the British Museum promises to lift the lid on what beauty meant for the ancient Greeks. But while we gaze at the serene marble statues on display – straining male torsos and soft female flesh – are we seeing what the ancients saw?
When we think of reading for our children, we are often misled into thinking that we need to focus on one type of book, such as picture books or novels in order to practise specific, reading-related skills. However, this narrowly-focused approach to reading instruction can often have undesirable benefits, such as turning kids off reading altogether.
Narcissistic children feel superior to others, believe they are entitled to privileges and crave admiration from others. When they don’t get the admiration they want, they may lash out aggressively. Why do some children become narcissistic, whereas others develop more modest views of themselves?
A lot of previous research has suggested that young people living in single-mother households are at an educational disadvantage. But our new study looking at the lives of 10,000 teenagers suggests that this is not true. A stable family, even if it is a lone-parent one, is the best place to grow up.
What keeps us prisoners of our illusions? Our assumptions—the things we believe are true that really are not. For example, on my way to work during rush hour, a guy in a Lexus speeds by, cuts in front of me, then weaves in and out of traffic at a hundred miles an hour. My first reaction is...
Many parents are moving towards “gentle parenting”, where they choose not to use rewards (sticker charts, lollies, chocolates, TV time as “bribes”) and punishments (taking away “privileges”, time-out, smacking) to encourage good behaviour, but encourage good behaviour for the sake of doing the right thing.
Antipsychotic medications, such as Risperdal, Seroquel and Abilify, were developed to treat adults with major mental illnesses including schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. But in recent years, their use has extended to treat conditions such as autism and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) in children and adolescents.
As a counselor to couples for many years, I’ve learned to spot the distinctive stages we travel through over the course of an intimate relationship. Although these stages are predictable, even inevitable, we have the power to choose how to travel through them as self-aware actors who are in charge of our lives.
Children learn to lie from about the age of two. The first lies children learn to tell are denials of wrongdoing. From the age of three they also learn to tell “white” lies. But what can we do to encourage children to tell the truth?
It’s often thought that we are hardwired by eons of natural selection to be attracted to particular physical traits; that preference is thought to guide a search for healthy mates to help us produce healthy offspring. But the study by Yang and Leonard Lee of the National University of Singapore challenges the notion that our inborn ideas of physical attractiveness are immutable.
Why does a four-year-old play when a 14-year-old creates? It’s often argued that play is central to the lives of young children. Yet the play of older children and adults is often seen as leisure, escapism or even deviance. But there should not be such a binary division between what is educational and what is frivolous.
Relationships seem to be about partner matching. Therefore the apparent robustness of sex differences in preferences may largely be an artifact of the focus on sex at the expense of other more meaningful variables.
- By Gregg Levoy
We can probably all relate to the experience of feeling divided within ourselves, occasionally against ourselves, and love will certainly induce this as handily as any of life’s experiences. A little-known fact about Cupid may help explain this. He is said to have carried in his quiver two kinds of arrows, one struck you with love, the other with hate.
Do you take the people you love for granted? Do you just assume they will always be there? Do you tell them often enough that you love and care about them, or do you feel there is no need as they probably already know?
If we want to make the world a better place, we need to work on having healthy boundaries! And by this I mean… we understand that I am me and you are you and that each of us has a right to be here and to choose and experience the consequences of all our thoughts, words and actions.