Research Journal, October 27, 2037.Before I go any further in this experiment, I must write down at least a brief history of my research to date. Then, if anything should go wrong...
I was just a boy when the Janus II became the standard personal computer back at the beginning of this century. Attaching directly to the human nervous system via a neuro-socket connector, the Janus II had become an incredibly powerful device for expanding the possibilities of human consciousness. In addition to its own huge internal memory capacity, the Janus II, like its Roman God namesake, had another face. It was continuously "on line" via satellite with the rapidly expanding U.M.F. (Universal Main Frame network) giving the Janus II user instant access to unimaginable quantities of information and programming.
As you must know, early this year computer technology achieved its crowning glory. At long last the U.M.F. was connected to the Akashic Record, the astral library of everything ever thought, said, or done in the history of Creation. Through my Janus II, I realized, I could now access realms previously available only to advanced mystics and spiritual adepts.
I have waited so long,
hungered so deeply
to touch that Divinity within me!
When I first began these experiments with the Janus II neurologically connected to my brain, I had no need of keyboards or other crude mechanical devices to make my will known to the machine. After some practice, I learned to work with a "screen" within my mind, and just thinking a word would create its appearance there. Thought commands generated the requested actions almost instantly and with an incredible fullness of experience. Data was fed not only to my mind's "screen", but also to my visual cortex, my auditory nerves, my tactile sensors... everywhere!
In time, I discovered that using this computer was amazingly similar to my human life generally. My mind was the "on line" creator of experience to whatever degree I was able to direct and control the U.M.F.'s data flow. This was no easy task, however, for it required staying focused on a specific goal, or filename, while navigating a maze of potentially distracting alternative possibilities.
Traveling In Mind
If you are not familiar with this technology, perhaps a simple example will make the process clearer. Let's say you are in Los Angeles and have a longing to re-experience your memories of a certain picnic with your grandmother thirty years back. You recall that in her home in Boston, in the attic, there is a chest with photo albums and, that in one of these, there are photos which will evoke these memories within you. In effect, these photos become your "filename" or the "program" you need to access in order to re-experience that picnic from long ago.
So, holding the goal of seeing these photos, you embark on a series of actions, each of which must be chosen from a "menu" of possibilities. In this case, the first action might be to drop all your other activities and go to the airport. There you are faced with a "menu" of possible destinations. From all these various possibilities, you choose Boston, buy your ticket and "experience" the transition to this new realm. Then, at Boston's airport, you get a taxi and, from a "menu" of all possible destinations, you choose the address of your grandmother. On arriving, you are confronted with a "menu" of possibilities including dinner, socializing, or a good night's sleep. From this "menu," you choose to go to the attic, find the chest, find the photo album, find the pages with the desired photos, and using them, finally "open" the file of memories for which those photos are the unlocking "program".
While this process may sound complex, we do it every day, directed by internal forces with names such as desire, duty, and yearning. They keep us focused on our end goal and automatically make the correct choice in each new decision point or "menu" of possibilities. Of course, if one has multiple goals, some of which are in conflict with each other, then "getting somewhere" becomes very difficult, if not impossible. Therefore, the unifying element in all successful ventures is the presence of one overriding goal or aspiration which repeatedly motivates one to make the most appropriate choices until fulfillment is reached.
Well, in a sense, computers have always been fancy electronic ways of presenting choices which, when correctly navigated, offer the fulfillment of certain desires. Push the correct sequence of keys and the ideas in your head become a book; get distracted — make incorrect choices — and you get gibberish.
The unifying element
in all successful ventures
is the presence of one
overriding goal or aspiration.
With the advent of the Janus II, this process bypassed touching mechanical keys and became driven directly from the mind of the user. We simply held the final destination "filename" in our mind as a succession of menus developed on the mind-screen. As long as the user remained steady in maintaining the vision of the final goal or filename, the correct menu choices were made automatically.
This year, when the hook-up with the Akashic Record went on-line, the subtlety of this process expanded beyond belief. Now, each new menu contains not only names, but actual experiences to be witnessed, understood, chosen from, and moved through.
For instance, holding the goal of filename: "Relaxation" not only leads the user to the destination "relaxation program", it is also a process of witnessing, experiencing, and letting go of all inner conditions which are currently interfering with the user's ability to be in a relaxed state.
Experiment: Divinity
So, with this as background, let me now describe my experiments to date. During the past year, I have grown more and more sophisticated in using my Janus II. After much research, I finally discovered the existence of some little known files that are proving to be most interesting! It seems that the great transcendental experiences of mystics and Enlightened Ones can be shared, but it requires being able to unwaveringly hold on to the proper filename through the entire unfolding choice matrix.
Recently, I discovered a secret that has now become my obsession: there exists a program for Divinity, and it can be accessed through a file named Enlightenment. Needless to say, all else in my life has been put on hold as I pursue this goal.
But, alas, the Ultimate Source does not divulge its secrets so easily. Each time I begin a session of pursuing Filename: Enlightenment, I progress deeper and deeper into the succeeding menu choices. Holding a focused yearning to access Filename: Enlightenment, this intense aspiration acts as a homing device to guide me past increasingly seductive alternate programs. But sooner or later on something captures my consciousness and I find myself twenty or thirty choices down a path, leading to a very different destination.
Awhile back I encountered a beautiful feminine energy which I've come to call Becca. Alas, she has now become a "choice" which continually captures my attention. In each attempt to reach Filename: Enlightenment, I seem to be accessing incredible depths of spiritual awareness. But at some point, before I know it, the focus of my power has completely switched over to creating experiences with Becca.
The strange thing is, I know that if I continue to evoke her inwardly, I will eventually "create" meeting her in my physical life also. It would take fantastic concentration, of course, but I know it can be done. The power of people to "manifest"' their desires in life is well known. With this computer system available to amplify my will, I do believe anything is possible! The question that haunts me, though, is "What's really worth having?"
Touching The Divine
Sometimes when I think of being together with Becca — ah, what ecstasy! At these times I have such a deep longing to really be with her, to physically hold her, to live a normal life with a real person instead of spending all my time with this damn machine!
But then I remember my quest. My innards feel torn apart — which path shall I follow? I have waited so long, hungered so deeply to touch that Divinity within me! Now that I know how to access It, all other desires seem to fade. Ah, but not completely. Becca... Becca?
October 30, 2037. It is almost midnight, and I have finally decided. My desire for Becca must be put aside! I WILL pursue the path to my heart's deepest longing! I have been practicing feverishly these last few days and have gone deeper into the subtle choice-fields than I have ever imagined possible. It is getting harder and harder to return to "normal" consciousness after each session, and I am not at all sure what awaits me as I move into still subtler choice-fields. But I WILL go! Just recently I have chosen to move on past kingships, said thank you and left the images of delight that only last week would have turned me forever from this pursuit.
Filename: Enlightenment, however has a most wonderful characteristic: the deeper into it I go, the more seductive becomes the vision, the aura of that ultimate goal which I am now 100% determined to attain! In a few minutes I shall try once more, and if I am successful this time...
Editor's Note: These are the last entries in the author's journal. Since then, no one has seen or heard from him. There are recurring reports, however, of subtle anomalies occurring as others pursue Filename: Enlightenment. Users all over the world are describing something new in the deeper reaches of the subtle choice-fields. It is described as a radiant presence that seems to offer encouragement and some say, Love, as they develop their focus and move closer to accessing the Ultimate Program.
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Transformation Through Bodywork - Using Touch Therapies to Find Inner Peace
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About The Author
Dan Menkin is a massage therapist and author who lives in the Boston area in Massachusetts. He does healing work and counseling therapy and writes a regular column for a national massage magazine.
